Trauma from childhood or difficult experiences throughout our lives can have a lasting impact on how we see ourselves, others, and the world. It becomes the lens through which we experience life.
You only have one childhood — whether it was good or bad — and that becomes the foundation for how you understand yourself and others. Growing up, we’re like little sponges, absorbing everything we hear, see, and feel in our homes. The way we’re treated by our parents, the dynamics between caregivers, or even how we’re compared to our siblings — all of these experiences shape our sense of worth and influence how we show up in relationships later in life.
If we were raised by narcissistic or emotionally unavailable parents, we may grow up feeling unseen, unheard, or unloved. Those early wounds can resurface in adulthood — especially in our romantic relationships — as feelings of unworthiness or fear of abandonment. This can lead to people-pleasing, staying quiet to avoid conflict, or recreating patterns from childhood that once kept us safe. When we are unseen and unheard, we can’t attract trouble — and sometimes that feels safer than being vulnerable.
I always say, “There is function in dysfunction.” Even in our most painful experiences, there is resilience and strength. Healing means learning to understand those patterns and choosing to grow beyond them.
This is where Inner Child work comes in. It’s about reaching inward to connect with the part of you that was hurt, misunderstood, or neglected — and finally giving that child the unconditional love, safety, and validation they deserved. It’s about becoming the parent you needed back then and learning to trust and believe in yourself again.
This is where the work starts…
